I want to approach this question…When is Enough, Enough???
Please give me some insight on my relationship with my lady friend (S.H. are her initials) of 10 years. She was the love of my life in the first year of our relationship and then she slowly started changing. I asked her to move in with me, to marry me and live the rest of her life with me…she said she would think about it. She did move in with me, but never committed to marry me. As time went on, she started to become resentful, moody, and started drinking heavily. I am still in love with her, but I feel damaged. How do I stay and keep my sanity, or how do I move on and start over? My heart is breaking. Can you help me?
Steve B. – Pensacola, FL
You start off with grandiose dreams of what can be, and as the days and weeks and even years unfold, you look back on all of the excuses you have made for this relationship not adding up to what you desired. Are you just settling for just anything? Are you afraid that if you let go of this one person, that there will be nothing left for you in the pot? Oh my god/goddess!! We have all been in this chapter of our life at one time or another. How do you get out of this trap, even when you know that is the wisest and healthiest thing to do? You take baby steps. You slowly grab back your sanity, pull up your boot straps and draw that line in the sand. Affirmations are very good – “I am a beautiful person and there is someone that is waiting for me to show up, that is just as wonderful and loving as I am!” Another good one “I deserve to be loved the way I love!” Visualizations are very, very powerful also. I teach my clients to use a visualization board. This can be any size and it will be filled with pictures, words, affirmations, art …anything that puts you in that loving space. Once you are in this space, the universe starts seeing your desires and goes to work to help you manifest your dreams. Yes, there is a grieving process that goes with these changes, a death so to speak, and then we move on. You need to let go of that space/relationship that is not working, to make room for that special relationship. You don’t buy new living room furniture until you get rid of the old set. You have only this lifetime to be the happiest you can be. I know you have heard this before, but isn’t it great when we get a little butt in the head once in awhile to remind us of who we are and what we are capable of? As you take hold of your life, you will see changes in all areas that support your desires. Remember though, some of these changes will come in the guise of sadness, depression or even anger, but this too is a process to help you get to the other side. When these little challenges start showing their funny little horns, take a deep breath, take a look inside, cry if you need to and then just let it fly away in a beautiful pink balloon (ok, for all of you animal rights people, the birds will not choke, this is a pretend balloon…hee)
Love and light!
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